We are all unique. We are all a mix of different personalities. There are four main personality types. Peaceful Phlegmatic, Popular Sanguine, Powerful Choleric and Perfect Melancholy. Most of us have traits from one type and some traits from another. Some people are a mix of two different personality types. There are Natural Blends, Complimentary Blends and Opposites.
The first Natural Blend is a mix of Popular Sanguine and Powerful Choleric. This blend is outgoing, optimistic and outspoken. They make great leaders or have the potential for great leaders. They are a mix of positive traits such as; fun loving, able to accomplish goals, determination, able to direct others. Their negative traits can be; bossy, impatient, interrupts and controls the conversation and impulsive. The second natural blend is a mix of Perfect Melancholy and Peaceful Phlegmatic. This blend is introverted, soft-spoken and pessimistic. Their positive traits are; they love to study, have the ability to get along well with people and they make great educators. Some negative traits include; they procrastinate and they have trouble decision making.
The first Complimentary Blend is a mix of Powerful Choleric and Perfect Melancholy. Their positive traits are; their leadership drive, achieving goals, analytical detail-conscious schedule-orientated mind and have the great potential to be successful. A negative trait is they can be very overbearing. The second Complimentary Blend is Popular Sanguine and Peaceful Phlegmatic. Their positive traits are; takes it easy and has fun, easygoing nature, warm and they make very good friends. Some negative traits are; can be lazy, no direction or focus and poor at handling money.
The first Opposite is a mix of Popular Sanguine and Perfect Melancholy. This mix can have emotional problems due to the ups and downs of their outgoing nature along with a negative outlook. The second Opposite is Powerful Choleric and Peaceful Phlegmatic. This mix can have a work hard attitude at work and when they get home never get around to doing anything as they go into chill mode.
Understanding ourselves and others is the main component of self-improvement. It helps us understand why we behave in a certain way and why others behave the way they do. It also helps us accept our weaknesses and others weaknesses. We can all work on our weaknesses and brush up our strengths.
I am mainly Peaceful Phlegmatic, but have a lot of traits from Perfect Melancholy. I have to learn to accept compliments, not to be too sensitive about what other people say and not to feel guilty about my decisions. I need to motivate myself when it comes to my goals and take control of situations and not leave it to others.
Littauer, F. (1992). Personality plus. (Part Four), Tarrytown, N.Y.: F.H. Revell Co.
Each personality type has its own strengths and weaknesses. It is important to highlight them and work on reducing the weaknesses and improving the strengths.
Talk too much: they need to talk half as much as usual and let someone else control the conversation, watch their listeners for boredom, get to the point and not exaggerate when talking and telling stories.
They are self-centred: they have to learn to be sensitive to other people, listen and look at each person they are speaking to and listen to others.
They do not have good memories: they must pay attention to people’s names and write everything down so they can remember it later.
They are fickle: they need to take time for people and put others needs first.
Interrupt and answer for others: start to enjoy silence and let others do the talking.
Disorganised and immature: they need to focus on sticking to the same job, take time to achieve what they want, get round to getting things done, grow up, face responsibilities and make realistic plans.
Easily depressed: they need to start being cheerful, don’t take things personally, not read into things too deeply, smile at people, keep all situations positive, be enthusiastic, don’t get hurt easily, look for the best in people, when things go wrong be grateful of the experience and learn from it.
Have low self-images: they have to accept compliments and address insecurities.
Procrastinate: it is essential they get organised and carry things out quickly and not to spend too much time planning.
Unrealistic demands on others: they need to relax their standards, everything in life is not perfect.
They are compulsive workers: they need to learn to relax, don’t need to organise everything, do not put pressure on others and plan some leisure activity not just work.
Must be in control: let others be the leader for a change, relax when not in charge, they do not have to be right all the time and not look down on others, stop manipulating and be open.
Don’t know how to handle people: they must be patient with people, keep their opinions to themselves until asked, be more approachable, not be bossy and overbearing, stop the controversy and causing trouble.
Are always right which makes them unpopular: allow others to be right for a change, apologise if they have done something wrong and admit to their faults because everyone has them.
Do not get enthusiastic: they are unable to get excited about things or show it.
Resist change: they do not like change so they have to learn to embrace it.
Seem lazy: they must take responsibility for their lives, don’t put things off, do things they can today and motivate themselves to do things.
Quiet and willful: they need to communicate their feelings, if things are not ok, say they are not, they have to open up and be honest about how they feel.
Wishy-washy attitude: they have to make decisions and accept responsibility for them and learn to say no.
Improving My Personality
I am not good at making decisions because I do not want to hurt someone else’s feelings so I have to learn to say no. I know that I will never be able to please everyone so just do what is best for myself. Be true to myself and be happy with it.
I have to work on accepting compliments and believing them. When someone compliments me I have to thank them. Compliments build confidence. I am insecure at times and need to build my confidence and feel assured when I carry out any task that I do and that I will do it to the best of my ability.
Getting things done is important so I have not to spend too much time on the planning side. If I make a rough plan of what I need to do and proceed to carry it out. Planning is important but I must also follow through with the task. I have a habit of putting things off until a later date so I must be more motivated and spur myself into action.
I must not expect things to go perfectly and if things do not, I must work to improve and learn from it.
I am not the type of person that shows enthusiasm or excitement. It does not mean that I do not get enthusiastic or excited, I just do not show it. I am aware this can annoy people or make people feel that I am not interested in them so I need to show more enthusiasm. I have a habit of not expressing how I feel and this affects my relationships with others. I have to be more open about my feelings and tell people how I am feeling to improve my relationships.
I need to try new things and broaden my horizons, I have to be more adventurous and think of something new at least once a week.
I am aware that I have a tendency to be too sensitive and take things that people say to heart. I can read into things too deeply and overreact or get the wrong idea about a particular situation. I need to look at things positively and not take the opinion of others too seriously.
Littauer, F. (1992). Personality plus. (Part Three), Tarrytown, N.Y.: F.H. Revell Co.
Everyone is unique. We all have different strengths and weaknesses. When we understand ourselves we can improve our personalities.
I have many strengths and weaknesses. I can polish up my strengths and chip away at my weaknesses.
Strengths; adaptable, peaceful, submissive, considerate, reserved, sensitive, patient, shy, obliging, faithful, diplomatic, consistent, inoffensive, deep, musical, thoughtful, listener, contented, pleasant and balanced.
Weaknesses; bashful, unenthusiastic, reticent, forgetful, insecure, uninvolved, hesitant, permissive, alienated, nonchalant, withdrawn, timid, doubtful, introvert, moody, slow, loner, sluggish, reluctant and compromising.
According to Florence Littauer who wrote Personality Plus, there are four distinct personality types; Popular Sanguine, Perfect Melancholy, Powerful Choleric and Peaceful Phlegmatic.
Let us first examine the Popular Sanguine Personality. This personality is an extrovert, a talker and an optimist. They are emotional, demonstrative, are fun to be around and are very social as they love to be with people. They are outgoing and see excitement in everything they do and their bubbly personalities attract attention. They are talkative and are the life and soul of the party. Memorising names and dates are not strong qualities, but they will remember the colour of a dress for example. They are warm and enjoy contact with other people. They take centre stage, are childlike and naive, curious and they do not want to miss anything. They are helpful, love to volunteer and are very popular, their creative side loves to think up new ideas. They often run late and avoid work at all costs, but have the ability to charm, inspire others and make friends easily. I have two qualities of a Popular Sanguine Personality; forgetful and permissive.
Now to examine the Perfect Melancholy Personality. This personality is an introvert, a thinker and a pessimist. They are deep thinkers, are undemanding and like to be alone. They follow schedules and are organised. Routine is important to them, no matter how dull, and they get upset if it is changed in any way. They are serious and reliable. They are the poets, artists, writers, musicians, engineers, inventors and scientists. They are the soul, spirit, mind and heart of the human race. They have a quiet and thoughtful temperament and foresees problems before they happen. They are unable to take things at face value, instead, they like to search for the inner truths in every situation. They are thinkers, planners, creators and inventors. Excellence exists in these fields because they have the patience to sit practising a musical instrument, creating or inventing something new and making plans. They work alone as having a conversation would slow down their progress. Their trait of evaluating the progress or performance of others can make people around them nervous and edgy. They are very serious people and many a genius of the world will have a Perfect Melancholy personality. They are born with genius potential that needs to be properly motivated and nurtured and are the most talented and creative of all the personality types. They like charts, figures, graphs and lists and are very detailed in things they do, for example hanging the toilet paper the correct way round on the holder, and keeping clothes neatly organised in their wardrobe. They love order. In their wardrobe, they are likely to have different sections for shirts, t-shirts, skirts, trousers and jackets. They do not like outsiders interfering with their wardrobe, desk, etc. They like to have things just as they want it. Being neat and tidy on their person is important to them and their surroundings. They even go around picking up after others. They are perfectionists and have high standards. The speed you do something does not matter, what is important is how well it is done. Being economical is important to this personality trait. They hate wasting anything. They love a bargain and love to get their monies worth. They make excellent counsellors because they have the ability to listen and analyse people’s problems and come up with a solution. They are caring, compassionate and seek ideal mates to the extent they list the qualities they are looking for and measure them up. I have thirteen qualities of perfect melancholy; considerate, sensitive, faithful, deep, musical, thoughtful, bashful, insecure, alienated, withdrawn, introvert, moody, loner.
Both of these personalities, Popular Sanguine and Perfect Melancholy, even though opposite in many ways, are both very emotional. I see the Perfect Melancholy and Popular Sanguine traits in myself, although Perfect Melancholy is by far the strongest personality type of the two. I like to fold clothes neatly in my cupboards and I prefer to do it myself so it is in the correct place, however, I am not the type of person with really high standards enough to have a wardrobe as organised to the standards that the Perfect Melancholy usually thrives. For me, it is ok to have a t-shirt hanging next to a dress. I love a bargain and I hate to waste food. I prefer to freeze food rather than throw out fresh food that I have not used. I pick up after my son to make sure things are done properly, probably too much than is necessary. I love music and playing musical instruments. I also like writing, probably the reason why I started this blog was because the organised side of me was wanting to keep an organised log of what I have learned. I am also very forgetful. I can have something to remember to do, forget to do it and I will not realise until the next day.
The next personality type is the Powerful Choleric. They are the extrovert, the doer, and the optimist. Their intentions are direct, clear and active. Things have to be done right for the Powerful Choleric. They are always on a high and aim to succeed. They communicate in an open manner with people and they thrive on being in charge. Their ability to get things done is clear and you would know where you stand with a Powerful Choleric. They have fantastic leadership qualities, are determined and strong willed. Changing what is out of place and correcting what is wrong is important to the Powerful Choleric and are quick to campaign for things that are right. They make decisions, are strong willed and save time. They often make others around them feel insecure with their assertiveness and assurance. Goals are very important and they are interested in achieving them. Their organisation skills are vital so everything runs smoothly and efficiently. They see how tasks should be handled. Many Powerful Cholerics become professional athletes, they love to achieve the impossible. Friends are something they do not have the need for. They don’t like to make mistakes and always know they are right. They rise to unexpected situations. I have no qualities of the Powerful Choleric.
The final personality to look at is the Peaceful Phlegmatic. They are the introvert, the watcher and the pessimist. They are easygoing, adaptable and want to avoid conflict. The way that they think is that ‘things do not really matter that much’. They are the easiest of all the temperaments to get on with, are content and tolerant. They enjoy friendships, but also love to be on their own. They are solid and balanced and do not function in the extremes of life. They are not ‘born’ leaders but can get to the top through being able to get along with everyone. They make excellent parents although they are not good at the disciplinarian side. Their calm, unemotional logic will reduce any situations that are tense. They do not feel the need for credit, they are comfortable with not being the centre of attention. Being able to stay calm during a storm is one of their strong qualities. Patience and never being in a hurry is a quality of the Peaceful Phlegmatic. They do not have any great expectations and their pessimistic nature keeps them feel ‘realistic’ towards life. The administrative ability is created through their competent and steady attitude to their work. Their good listening abilities, easy to get along with, relaxed, calm, cool, well-balanced, pleasant attitude makes them the best friend to have of all. I have twenty-five qualities of the Peaceful Phlegmatic; adaptable, peaceful, submissive, reserved, patient, shy, obliging, diplomatic, consistent, inoffensive, listener, contented, pleasant, balanced, unenthusiastic, reticent, uninvolved, hesitant, nonchalant, timid, doubtful, slow, sluggish, reluctant and compromising.
My personality type is Peaceful Phlegmatic. I always want to avoid conflict at all times, I hate conflict. I love to spend time with my friends and I also love to be on my own. Being a leader does not come naturally to me but I do get on well with people. I feel I am weak at discipline when it comes to my son and when dealing with people. I listen to people more than I talk and I am able to stay calm in difficult situations. I feel I have held myself back throughout life by letting other people have their way and not being assertive enough about my own needs. However, I am a balanced person and in more ways than not I am content with life.
Littauer, F. (1992). Personality plus. (Parts One and Two), Tarrytown, N.Y.: F.H. Revell Co.
There are two types of people, positive thinkers and negative thinkers. Positive thinkers always think ‘I can’, find solutions, look for the good in other people, appreciate what they have and see possibilities. However, negative thinkers think ‘I can’t’, dwell on problems, find fault with others, focus on what is missing and see limitations. People who are successful do not quit, when things go wrong or do not work out they make another attempt. No matter how difficult things get, choose a positive attitude.
How you think reflects your circumstances. If you think you do not deserve much you will attract people who will not treat you right. To improve your way of thinking to be more positive, read and listen to something positive every day, ideal in the morning and at night. Do not expect overnight success, it takes time, effort, commitment and patience.
Learn to overcome obstacles. Keep imagining in your mind how you want to perform. If you do this you will perform the way you want. Be willing to do whatever it takes to accomplish your goal. If you are not prepared to do this then you are not committed enough. Life will continue to test you. Things will not always go smoothly. Above all, enjoy what you do so working towards your goal is not a chore. Be able to take rejection as it can take years to achieve what you want. Turn problems into opportunities, problems will be replaced with something better. Having challenges makes you appreciate family and friends, gives you motivation and makes you realise the good things you have in your life. When a relationship ends you will go on to have a more satisfying relationship with someone else and you will develop a greater feeling of self-worth.
Keller, J. (2012). Attitude is everything. (Part 1), East Norwich, NY: Attitude is Everything, Inc.
Words have an incredible power of reinforcing beliefs. The thought is first, then the words you use to support the thought, words then strengthen belief, belief leads to action, then action becomes results. When you say to yourself you ‘can’t do’ something, your words make you believe it. So it is important to say to yourself that you ‘can do’ something so that you will achieve what you want. For example, if you are going to do a talk in front of hundreds of people, first you think about the situation, then you use words such as ‘I am going to forget everything I want to say’ or ‘I am confident that I know everything I am going to talk about’, depending whether your words are positive or negative, you will believe you are going to do well or not, this belief leads to action on how you will perform and your results will be good or bad depending on your performance. The words you use are very important for the outcome.
A good tip is to avoid discussing your goals with people who are negative or people who will not support you. You want to keep feeding your mind with positive thoughts but do not discourage feedback. Share your goals with someone you trust to support you and give you positive feedback, people who are helpful. Telling someone about your goal is a great motivator, you will feel obliged to fulfil it.
Being positive makes you and the people around you feel good. Think the things in your life are great rather than terrible. If you are a positive, lively person, people will be interested in you. Complaining is a waste of everyone’s time and it does not solve anything. We must remember to reflect on everything that is important in our life. If you feel you need to complain about something. It is important to stop, write on a piece of paper everything you are grateful for and everything that is good in your life. If there is something you are not happy with, change it if you can.
Keller, J. (2012). Attitude is everything. (Part 2), East Norwich, NY: Attitude is Everything, Inc.
The friends we choose reflects the sort of person we are. If we spend time with negative people, we will be negative. If we spend time with positive people, we will be positive. It is important to think about the consequences of spending time with certain people. Toxic people are always dwelling on the negative and will emphasise all the things we can’t do as well as refusing to find ways to solve problems. On the other hand, positive people are supportive, lift our spirits and make us feel happy. When we spend time with them, they will make us feel inspired, supported and enthusiastic. If we hear something often enough, we will believe it, so it is best to listen to positive comments and feedback. This does not mean to put people out of our lives that are close to us such as relatives or close friends. It is about keeping in mind the information that we get from them does not affect our well-being. Spend less time with people that do not encourage us and spend more time with people that will teach us how to be successful, how to be positive, that make us feel good and help us.
The best way to develop ourselves is by doing things we are afraid to do. Fears are the challenges that stand in front of our personal growth. It is easier to back away from doing the things that we are frightened of because it relieves the fear and anxiety we feel going through with the task. However, we pay a heavy price from backing out of fears as we sabotage any chances of success, we will feel frustrated and our life will be very dull and boring. Keeping a positive attitude helps us follow through with our fears and fears will die if we confront them.
Success is only impossible when we quit. It is achieved through a step by step process, a little bit at a time. We should not think of giving up and learn to be committed. We must educate ourselves through reading books and talking to successful people. We need to prepare for failure as most people experience failure before success, they learn from their failures . This will encourage us to grow.
To be successful in life, we need to have a positive and enthusiastic attitude. Being involved with others and be a ‘giver’ not always a ‘taker’. Listen to what others have to say about their dreams, their aspirations and offer support and encouragement. Treat everyone as being important, treat them with dignity and respect, go beyond our comfort zone, ask for help and congratulate others on their accomplishments.
Following these points will be the start to a successful future.
Keller, J. (2012). Attitude is everything. (Part 3), East Norwich, NY: Attitude is Everything, Inc.
During my time working on personal development, I have noticed myself with a more positive, productive mindset and I am aware of the areas I need to improve.
I have learned what I am looking for out of life and the path I need to take to achieve my vision of financial freedom. I have to create different goals to achieve what I want and keep reworking them.
It is important to use my mind to enhance my expectations, my belief on what life will be like once I have achieved my vision and realising the power that the subconscious mind has over my thoughts. Through daily mental rehearsal, I can achieve a clear picture of how it will feel to have achieved the end result of my vision.
I have learned that taking action is important in achieving and using all my energy on important tasks. If I do not stay focused, it is easy to get distracted and fall into the trap of not doing the tasks I need to do. Generating more positive thoughts rather than negative thoughts will balance my life towards a more positive outlook. If I have more negative thoughts, I will have a more negative view of life. If I have more positive thoughts, I will have a more positive view of life. It is important that I focus on this to have a more positive balance.
Belief and how I talk to myself plays an important part in success. It is so easy to talk myself out of something. I have been doing this for years. Believing in myself and removing all those negative thoughts from the past is the step towards empowerment. How I view myself is what will give me a richer life. The most important ingredient for a richer life is my self-image and being really happy with who I am. I have learned that thoughts are just thoughts and I have to educate myself to not let them control my life. Negative things that were said to me in the past do not need to rule my mind and I need to say good things to myself on a daily basis. Negativity is a choice and I need to dismiss any thoughts that are not positive.
The fear of failure is something that has controlled my life for a long time. Instead of thinking to myself what can go wrong, I need to think what will go right. I must not worry about other peoples opinions and not worry about what people think. I have to accept myself for who I am, not judge myself and learn to love myself. I need my mind working for me, not against me. I have learned that failing does not necessarily mean the end. I just need to overcome failures and say ‘I need to do better’.
Leaving my comfort zone is an essential component to growth. This is an area that I find difficult. I have always felt safe in my comfort zone, but I know I need to move out of it in order to grow. This is an area for me that I think will take time, but I need to focus on how it will benefit me and how staying within my comfort zone will hinder me.
I have to pick myself up at times when things do go wrong, things going wrong happens to everyone. Use any setbacks as feedback and not something that will stop me in my tracks. Instead of focusing on failures I have to say to myself; How can I do better? How can I be more productive? This is what I mean by feedback. Things I want in life are not always achieved immediately, they take time and the essential component is to stay on track. I will have to keep immersed in all my activities as when I have success in the things I do, it will make me happy. I have learned to keep motivated and not give up.
Managing my time will make my tasks more productive. I have to keep focused and finish all the tasks that I want to achieve. If I focus on completing a task before moving onto the next, this will help my time be more productive. Moving from one task to the other without completion will leave me without the sense of achievement as I will have many unfinished tasks to complete. This will also create stress and interfere with my focus. I have to put myself first and finish what I am doing at that moment, then move onto the next task.
The feeling of gratitude is important for my mind, body and spirit. Focusing on what I have in my life that is good and not taking up energy dwelling on what is bad will make me grow, as I will appreciate everything I have achieved. Being kind and considerate to others creates more trusting relationships and if you believe in yourself, others will believe in you. Doing tasks in a state of gratitude and optimism will give me fulfillment. This will increase the productivity of my business. Most important, I need to have patience.
For me, some of these habits can be mastered quickly, but other habits will take longer. Daily exercise and implementation of these strategies will improve my mind and quality of life.
O’Connor, Dave. How To Create The Mindset Of A Network Marketing Champion, (Chapter twenty-one). United Kingdom: Dreams Publishing, 2015. Print.
It is important that we break habits that are destructive in order to achieve success, not only in business, but in anything we do throughout our lives. They slow our progress and cause us to regress instead of progress. We have to think to ourselves that not all thoughts that pop into our head are true. Keep in control of our thoughts and actions, and adjust them if we are moving towards the negative. If a thought is not positive, then dismiss it. We want to be changing negative beliefs into positive ones and for this to become a habit. Shut down any negative thoughts quickly. We must always ask ourselves why we are doing something, because if we know the reason, we will be willing to do anything to succeed. There are no excuses, we have a choice.
My Action Plan:
I follow this process.
1 I have to think to myself; Who I have been in the past? What do I want to change? I was very critical of myself. I always thought negative about every situation. I felt I could never become successful and I had no motivation. I worry about the future and I felt angry about all my failures. I want to become a more positive person. Have the motivation to work hard and achieve what I want.
2 I highlight all my destructive emotions; FEAR: I feel fear at doing something new, outside of my comfort zone. WORRY: I worry about the future, if I can pay my bills, where I will be in a few years time. ANGER: I feel anger at my failures, if I could have done things differently. DEPRESSION: It makes me feel down when I think of the above emotions. I dwell on my mistakes.
I close my eyes and picture two roads. One is success and the other is failure. I think of a situation in my life where I fall into my destructive behaviour patterns. I feel that emotion. I then say STOP, picturing a stop sign. I feel how I want to feel now; How do I want to think and feel about this situation? What would I say? How do I talk to others with this new emotion? How do I act? I picture this situation with the new emotion and feel happy with it. I walk back from the stop sign and walk down the road to success. I see my vision on a billboard and it says ‘FINANCIAL FREEDOM’.
When I think to myself about my destructive emotions, feeling fear about moving out of my comfort zone only holds me back. I will try new things and think the ways it can benefit me. There is no point to worry. Worry gets me nowhere. I think to myself that I can pay my bills, I am in control of my future and my life will work out the way I want if I believe and have motivation. Feeling angry about the past does not change anything. I need to move forward and say to myself that what is in the past is in the past. I have to look to the future. Changing these emotions makes me feel happy and positive.
O’Connor, Dave. How To Create The Mindset Of A Network Marketing Champion, (Chapter seventeen). United Kingdom: Dreams Publishing, 2015. Print.