Photo by Louise MacPherson
We have all had times in our lives when people have hurt us to some degree. Learning to forgive is not an easy thing to do, however, it is better for us to forgive, here is why.
Forgive and forget is not a phrase that is completely accurate in my opinion. While forgiving is the best route to take, we never really forget how people treat us. It does depend on the severity of the action of course. Forgiving gives us a chance to forget the wrong that the person has done us. However, it is up to us to decide how we feel. If we forget, we might let our guard down and the person has the opportunity to harm us again. For example, a business partner betraying us would be a reason to forgive but not forget.
Forgiving is better for our own health and peace of mind. If we hold grudges it affects our thoughts and our health. We are filling our minds with negativity. When we forgive, it puts us in a more positive state of mind.
If we forgive someone who has wronged us we can decide whether we wish to continue to have a relationship with them. We need forgiveness in order to do this. If we choose to continue to have a relationship it will most likely have changed the relationship to some degree so this relationship would need work.
Forgiving a person does give them the chance to correct their error. It also gives them a chance to recognise their wrongs and of course forgive themselves. If the person who committed the wrong does not forget, they are not likely to commit the same mistake again and learn from it.